Shane – October 26th, 2000

I have been going out a lot lately. I wait for mum and dad to trail off to sleep and when I hear them snoring, I just sneak out.

It’s not just the secret stuff we do when were all together, but the best thing is that I get to cuddle up to Shane. I don’t like him in the way that I want to be his girlfriend, and I don’t think he likes me in that way either, but there’s something about him that is amazing to me.

Shane has bleached his hair blonde. Here is a portrait of him:


Okay, so he really doesn’t look like that. But sometimes he acts so crazy that he might as well be a caricature.

I think out of all of this whole mess, the best thing is that it has brought us closer together. He’s pretty much the only person I can stand to be around. He tries to get me to behave a bit though, which is not that awesome. He said I’m getting a little bit out of control, but I’ll be the judge of that.

The other night we all went to the abandoned war bunkers which are about 30 minutes away from where we live. When we got there we had a mini party in one of the old rooms. It smelt like urine and damp to be honest, but the company was good. We lit lots of candles that Lissy had bought with her. She’s the only person I know that has that many candles, let alone carries them around.

We were drinking some rum, and you know, other things we do.

Me and Shane ended up leaving the others behind, and I remember getting suddenly nervous. I don’t really know what’s going on. We’re best friends and we have been for ages. Why the hell am I getting nervous now?

Anyway… ahhh… I don’t even know if I can write this down. Here goes nothing. We were just hanging out in this other room, joking around. And then suddenly, he kissed me. Weird!

It was weird. But was it? Because I kissed him back too. And I felt, well, nervous, and fluttery like an idiot girl. We must have kissed for about 5 minutes… until everyone saw. I’m so embarrassed! I know it means nothing to either of us really, but it was nice… in a weird way… like I said.

Anyway, all this going out is really affecting the way I am in the day. Mum beeps me like 15 times in the morning, but sometimes I can’t get out of bed until she’s already in the car. I’ve missed a few days school, but I’m having too much fun to care. I know that sounds bad.

George has messaged me online a few times, but he hasn’t called, and I haven’t seen him in person. I just couldn’t care less about him anymore. I heard a rumor from Chels that he’s going out with that New Caledonia girl, but all his friends have seen her and they say she’s really ugly and that they don’t know why he broke up with me. He can seriously get lost because I don’t even miss him that much anymore.


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